Do You Have Feelings About Feelings?

If you do, then you’re batshit crazy. I’ll explain.

How American Culture Makes  People Batshit Crazy
The most disturbing aspect — the source of all these mental and dietary health problems in the US — about American culture (Anglo culture, really) is that it trains people to have feelings about feelings.  Like Chelsea getting mad at herself for being mad at her boyfriend because his wee wee malfunctioned at the wrong time; Jessica feeling guilty about being happy after she beats her bestie to win State.  Robbie getting depressed because he’s not who he thought he was now that he’s harboring racist thoughts after getting carjacked twice in two months by Black dudes; Susan afraid about becoming anxious during her solo.

What happens above is learned — vis-a-vis American moral education — and it’s not natural or healthy to behave like that. Real, raw, instinctive emotions are already tough enough to deal with, adding a layer of manufactured ones is bound to drive people nuts not just because there are more emotions to deal with, but because now there are conflicting emotions that make people’s internal compass — ie. instincts —  go haywire. Without instincts, people are as good as dead.

Below are some emotions Americans are taught to avoid feeling

  • Anger
  • Hate
  • Fear
  • Sadness
  • Anxiety

because they’re “negative.”  Okay, how so?  Dylan Thomas didn’t think anger a negative emotion when he wrote to his dying father:

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Or how about Jesus Christ, who goes ape shit on those who fuck with his shit? From the book of Matthew 21:12-13:

12 And Jesus entered the temple[a] and drove out all who sold and bought in the temple, and he overturned the tables of the money-changers and the seats of those who sold pigeons. 13 He said to them, “It is written, ‘My house shall be called a house of prayer,’ but you make it a den of robbers.”


Don’t piss off Jesus.  Or he’ll go ape shit on you.

What about fear? Courage isn’t the absence of fear, it’s the ability to move forward despite fear. If there’s no fear, there’s no courage and courage is one of those acts that make life worth living. Beginning to see how those who run away from so called negative emotions are spiritually dead? It’s the combination of anger and fear that makes courage possible. Passion is the combination of anger and love.  Fear and anxiety (or as Kierkegaard puts it, “Fear and Trembling”) makes faith. Now imagine life without courage, passion, and faith. Is it worth living?

Yet the curators of American culture insist that courage is possible only when there’s no fear, serenity if there’s no anger, success if there’s no anxiety, love if there’s no hate, happiness if there’s no sadness, pleasure if there’s no pain. As with all attempts to create Heaven on Earth, the unintended consequences have been disastrous: more emotional eating, more drug addiction, more mental health problems.

How People are Trained to Have Feelings About Feelings, (how to become emotionally corrupt)
Again, it’s not natural to have feelings about feelings (aka meta-feelings). Real emotions are instinctual and their purpose is to protect the feeler of them: fear when you unexpectedly encounter a lion in the wild; sadness when your beloved child dies; anger when cheated by a trusted friend; happy when your team wins.  Fake emotions, on the other hand — and this includes sentimentality, that “failure of feeling” and “mask of cruelty” — are taught. Here’s how:

Parent says: Don’t be mad at me!
Kid hears: It’s wrong to be angry

Teacher says: Don’t be sad!
Kid hears: There’s something wrong with feeling sad.

Coach says: Don’t be nervous!
Kid hears: There’s something wrong with feeling anxious

Commercial says: Don’t be scared!
Kid hears: There’s something wrong with feeling scared.

Customer says: You need to smile more if you want a tip (some cunt actually said this at another juice bar)
Employee hears: I need to be happy all the time for people to like me

Stranger says: I’m fine, how are you?
You hear: Everyone is always happy, why not me?

How do you think those bombarded with these asinine messages and exhortations are going to turn out? Erika the waitress is going to get stoned every day before work so she looks happy, dopey, and smiley for the pleasure of her emotionally corrupt customers who think going to a restaurant should be the same experience as going to Disneyland. Jane, who once practiced and practiced to become a concert pianist now needs anxiety meds to make it to school, much less to Carnegie Hall. Adam becomes a heroin addict because he lacks the anger to produce the natural pain-killers that’d get him through work drug free. Emily is on depression meds and when she’s not she binges on carbs because that’s what happens when you’re scared of being sad.

Bloody British Cunts    (aka BBC)

In 2017, the BBC ran a health story titled “Anger and hatred can make us feel happy, study says.”  This cross-cultural study “included some 2,300 university students from the United States, Brazil, China, Germany, Ghana, Israel, Poland and Singapore.” One conclusion:

People are happier if they are able to feel emotions they desire – even if those emotions are unpleasant, such as anger and hatred.”

Specific emotions don’t make people happy. It’s the ability to feel what one wants to feel that makes one happy. Put differently elsewhere in the article:

The researchers found that while people overall wanted to experience more pleasant emotions, they had the greatest life satisfaction if the emotions they experienced matched those they desired.

Another conclusion, that Westerners are unhappy because they’re hedonistic:

People want to feel very good all the time in Western cultures. Even if they feel good most of the time, they may still think that they should feel even better, which might make them less happy overall.

Since the BBC is run by a bunch of Bloody British Cunts, this article is biased as fuck: it assigns Anglo-centric moral value to specific emotions.  Anger and hate, for instance, are described as “unpleasant” and “negative” emotions. Except they’re not but by cultural decree. Which emotion do professional athletes use most often to stay focused and to play through pain: happiness or anger? Anger, of course, because that’s the emotion that releases natural pain killers in our bodies and improves focus and strength. I may be despicable and an angry motherfucker, but there isn’t one customer who’d describe me as lacking in motivation and vigor precisely because I allow myself to access the full spectrum of emotions — without judgment — and anyone who tells me how I ought to feel can kiss my ass.

Grandpa Hates Japs

My Chinese aunt once paid a compliment to the Japanese.  Since her father  (my grandfather) was present, she prefaced it with:

I hate the Japanese as much as anyone, but I have to admire how they’ve…

The preface makes clear that there’s no taboo among the Chinese against hating an ethnic group. In this case, this show of (manufactured) hate is used positively, as a show of respect for an elder’s experiences and perspective. Nobody in the family calls grandpa a racist for hating the Japanese, nobody tries to change his mind. I mean, why shouldn’t he hate the Japanese — he grew up watching them rape and pillage half his fucking country. Not saying forgiveness  isn’t a better option, but that’s for him to decide, not anyone else, because none of us understand what he experienced so it’s best to leave him be. He’ll stop hating once he’s ready to do so, not when other people tell him to do so.

Photos of beheaded civilians from Rape of Nanking. How soon would you hate and how long would it take you to forgive?

Stand-Up Comedy Doesn’t Exist in China (and what that has to do with the cost of therapy)
Nor in Russia, Germany, France, most of the world actually. Stand-up comedy is a uniquely Anglo invention, started and gained popularity in the UK during the emotionally repressive and imperialistically expansive Victorian Era (1837-1901). Historian Harold Perkins writes about the transformation of manners during the time leading into the Victorian Era:

Between 1780 and 1850 the English ceased to be one of the most aggressive, brutal, rowdy, outspoken, riotous, cruel and bloodthirsty nations in the world and became one of the most inhibited, polite, orderly, tender-minded, prudish and hypocritical.

In other words, Anglos went from being assholes to being politically correct, self-righteous, emotionally timid, phlegmatic assholes. Why did this transformation of manners happen? Let’s see what was happening geopolitically. During the 19th century, the British Empire added

…around 10,000,000 square miles (26,000,000 km2) of territory and roughly 400 million people were added to the British Empire. Unchallenged at sea, Britain adopted the role of global policeman…Alongside the formal control it exerted over its own colonies, Britain’s dominant position in world trade meant that it effectively controlled the economies of many countries, such as China, Argentina, and Siam, which has been described by some historians as an Informal Empire. (wiki entry on British Empire).

Here are a few details about what the British were up to:

  • 1789 To annihilate Australian aboriginals, British military brought bottles of smallpox to infect them. Ninety percent of aboriginal population died within 15 months.
  • 1806 Abandonment of Spanish POWs on barren island on the Rio de la Plata river during Napoleonic Wars to starve to death.
  • 1842 To reverse trade imbalance, Britain forces China to legalize and buy its opium, leading to an opioid epidemic that nearly destroys China.
  • 1845-1849  British policies lead to Great Potato Famine in Ireland, resulting in one million dead and another million emigrating to escape starvation because throughout the famine, the British continued to export out of Ireland agricultural products, such as wheat and beef, the English wanted.
  • 1857 The aftermath of the Indian Rebellion (1857–58), when convicted mutineers were tied in front of cannons and blasted, or sewn into pig or cow skins after death (for Muslims and Hindus respectively).
  • 1899-1902 The roundup of Boer civilians (mostly women and children) into the world’s first modern “concentration camps” during the Second Boer War

Is it an accident that the rapid rise of Britain to world dominance coincides with the sudden transformation of Anglo manners? I doubt it. To begin with, what do the British need to do to convince their subjects that they deserve to be ruled by the British? What do the British need to do to convince the themselves that it’s their divine “burden” to rule over their colonial and neo-colonial subjects and to treat them the way they do?

Bloody British Cunts who think they’re civilized even though they eat with chopsticks up their asses.

Answer: Everyone needed to be convinced that the  British are more civilized, that is, more removed from the state of nature than are their subjects.  And that begins with the repression of emotions and sticking a chopstick up one’s ass while one eats. After all, only animals and children act on instinct, while humans act on reason only, right? Rudyard Kipling writes about the imperialist mindset, from the satirical “White Man’s Burden,” 1899:

Take up the White Man’s burden
Send for the best ye breed
Go bind your sons to exile
To serve your captives’ need;
To wait in heavy harness,
On fluttered folk and wild
Your new-caught sullen peoples,
Half-devil and half-child

British colonized these people because they squat instead of sit in chairs and eat with chopsticks instead of sticking them up their asses. Now we know that squatting is healthier than sitting. Would you prefer to be “civilized” or healthy?

Anglo politeness, especially in the US, have become like religious prayers, entreaties for forgiveness for the forgotten and denied sins of a nation and its individual citizens.  Americans will, for instance, incessantly and inappropriately say “please” and “thank you,” as if chanting a mantra to showcase their good breeding and virtuous intentions, when in fact, these gratuitous mutterings are meant to mask their bigotry, hypocrisy, and cruelty. The more vile and socially inept they are, the more polite they are.

Which brings us back to the question: “Why is stand-up comedy a uniquely Anglo form of entertainment, most popular in English speaking nations?” It doesn’t exist in China or Russia or Germany, even though other forms of American and British entertainment — hip hop for instance  — are popular in these nations.

Because there’s no need for stand up comedy in places where political correctness doesn’t exist and emotional repression isn’t normal. The reason why stand-up comedy is so popular in the US is because since the end of the World War II, the US has taken over the role of the world’s police and asshole and now we have to convince ourselves and everyone else that we deserve that role. So we stop saying what’s on our mind and feel what we want to feel in order to convince ourselves that we’re somehow superior to those backward ass bigots even though we’re as bigoted and hypocritical as the British at their worst. Since it’s not natural and healthy to behave this way, we watch stand-up comedy to let out our repressed selves in a way that won’t desecrate our carefully curated public identities — successful stand up comedians say what everyone is thinking but are afraid to say.  Stand-up comedians are the modern court jesters of American middle-class society.

Ask a German, “How are you?” and he’ll respond truthfully. Ask a Russian “How are you?” and he’ll tell you it’s none of your business.  Ask a Chinese person that question and she’ll ignore you.  The people from the aforementioned don’t serve customers with a smile plastered on their faces and they never, ever smile while walking down the street unless they have an instinctive reason to do so because anyone who smiles like that must either be a fraud or an idiot. They navigate with their instincts, not with what they’re told is proper, polite and pleasant.

Life Doesn’t Have to Be This Way
Instead of telling ourselves and each other to not be sad, or angry, or anxious…we could ask each other why we’re sad, angry, or anxious, whatever it may be we’re feeling. And let each other know that it’s normal and expected to be anxious before performing solo, and nervous while performing it; to be angry when cheated; sad when your team loses; ashamed when you let someone down.

Instead of judging, let’s ask questions. Exploring why we are who we are instead of hiding who we are may be the first step toward recovery from an addiction to overthinking that’s ruining us.

Redneck Food is Healthier Than Stupid Middle-Class American Food.

Redneck cuisine is better for the environment too.  I’ll prove it.

Take roadkill cuisine, which according to Wiki is “considered unglamorous and mocked in pop culture, where it is often associated with stereotypes of rednecks and uncouth persons.”  Below are some of the advantages of roadkill meat:

  • low cost
  • organic meat that’s naturally high in vitamins and proteins with lean meat and little saturated fat
  • organic meat that’s free of antibiotics and other drugs
  • organic meat that doesn’t come from animals who lived in filthy overcrowded cages and pens

Meaning those deplorable roadkill scavengers are eating food that’s healthier and more environmentally friendly than the over-priced, over-modified, over-hyped and environmentally destructive bullshit people buy at Whole Foods. More examples of how Redneck food is superior later.  Let’s first take a look at what middle-class America thinks everyone should eat.

Why Middle Class America eats “BAD” food

Because the American middle-class doesn’t define itself in terms of economic clout and technological sophistication.  This demographic instead defines itself *against* another group, usually Rednecks (and otherwise the One Percent). And that’s precisely why the American middle-class — the most medicated demographic in the world — can’t think straight as consumers and make ridiculous demands to indulge their delusions about themselves. In this batshit crazy world, decisions are based less on practical considerations and more on identity politics. That’s why middle-class Americans have a habit of wanting to eat “BAD” food, as Paul Fussell puts it:

…in fruits and vegetables, “pretty” has overtaken actual, honest, and safe in the Basic American Diet.  What he’s getting at is the scandal of cosmeticizing produce to make it attractive to the ignorant — coloring oranges orange, for instance, or breeding apples and cherries and strawberries so impressively large that they’re quite tasteless. Now, in violation of all natural laws, apples are spotchless, wormless, and lustrously red or green.  Grapefruits are perfectly round, as firm as baseballs and as yellow as forsythia, and these phony appearances — BAD in a nutshell — are produced by an infinite number of exotic and untested constituents, residing in the chemicals used to bring on these freaks of visual vegetable perfection.


Middle America isn’t satisfied with botoxing and medicating just themselves, they have to botox and medicate their fruits and vegetables too because pompous people need pompous things, including pompous inbred food that look like this.


Middle-class Americans like their produce the way they like their people – everything should look the same.


instead of fruit and vegetables that may look like this:

and is superior in taste and nutrition to their uniformly “pretty” counterparts.  American middle class buy with their eyes instead of their minds, as if shopping for a street whore.

If this bizarre consumer demand for cosmetic uniformity of produce is a reflection of Middle-Class America’s intolerance for diversity of thought and personality, then what might the absence of fish and fowl heads on their dinner tables suggest about their psychological state?  Fussell again:

This manifestation of BAD does accord with American disinclination to accept unpleasant facts, like the cruel fact that oranges are really greenish-yellow and often ovoid, and the wormless apple is really an anomaly that, without dye and polish, will look pretty shabby.

There’s no demographic in history that’s this uncomfortable with being uncomfortable. And not just uncomfortable with racy and racist jokes and reminders that what they’re eating was once alive, these kooky conformists expect eating to be as easy as sucking on mommy’s tits back when they were babies. That’s why we have chicken nuggets, because they’re boneless and already cut up. That’s why there are no fish bones, ever.  The American middle-class eat like three year olds, which would be fine if they’d shut up and stop projecting their mommy and daddy issues onto those who just want to be left alone.


How fish is served in most parts of the world: head and fins on, bones inside. Fish bones, brains, cartilage and fat are nutritious, containing extra-high levels of vitamin A, omega-3 fatty acids, iron, zinc and calcium.


Travel around the world and you’ll see that people aren’t this squeamish and pampered when it comes to eating (except among the middle class in Anglo nations such as Canada and UK). This isn’t normal, it’s not healthy or tasty to eat this way (bones enhance flavor and provide essential nutrients) and it’s wasteful to discard edible food.

Roast duck is sold with head and penis on at Chinese butcheries. Notice the unusually large penis on third duck from right.


How Rednecks roast an entire pig, head, penis, and hoofs still on. Recycling old bicycle because Rednecks are innovative and care about the environment.


Examples of “BAD” food

The merely bad, Fussell points out, is “something like dog-do on the sidewalk, or a failing grade.” “BAD” taste, on the other hand, is anything “phony, clumsy, witless, untalented, vacant, or boring that many Americans can be persuaded is genuine, graceful, bright, or fascinating.” Here are more examples from past and present of BAD food middling America has and does enjoy because they think it’s healthier and/or tastier and/or more ethical when it’s not:

  • Skinless chicken breast (pay more for less!)
  • Extra lean ground beef (pay more for less!)
  • Kobe beef burgers (asshole burger, pay more for fat that will be cooked off)
  • Margarine (Frankenbutter)
  • White bread (Frankenbread)
  • Acai bowls (want to buy one so I can throw it at someone)
  • Fortune cookies (over a billion Chinese have asked: “who comes up with this shit?”)
  • Processed cheese (Frankencheese)

You can be sure that once middle-class America figures out that what they’re eating is actually BAD — like with margarine and white bread — cultural amnesia will set in and they’ll accuse Rednecks of perpetrating BAD culture.

Author is a Redneck Dyke. She says that middle-class Americans, not Rednecks, were the homophobes. Now that it’s not fashionable to be homophobic, middle-class America blames Rednecks for perpetrating homophobia when all they want is to not be told what to say and think.

Examples of Redneck food that’s good for you

  • Pig’s trotters (collagen good for skin and joint health)
  • Oxtail soup (best bone cut for broth that promotes joint health. Now upscale food)
  • Livermush (pig’s head and liver molded into pate, a variation of which I recently had at a high end restaurant)
  • Chitterlings (pig intestine contains lots of selenium which reduces risk of heart disease and asthma)
  • Squirrel (we’re overrun with gray squirrels.  Tastes sweet and nutty).

After bobbing for pig’s feet competition, this Redneck shows us how he eats his pig feet. Which is similar to how a Mexican eats pig feet.

Aside from the squirrel, the above is what people from most parts of the world eat. If what one eats is a reflection of one’s values and character, who do you think is more tolerant and open minded and responsible, the Redneck or the middle class American?  Who demands total conformity of manners and taste? Who lacks conviction and lives according to the latest fashion and fads? Who lives in an over-sanitized world maintained by intolerance and fear?  Who is the ignorant, uncouth fucktard now?





Frequently Asked Questions 21

Customer Complaints

(Angry woman over the phone) Why is my pineapple cut into the shape of a penis?
Is it too big or too small?

Hey, why didn’t I get a pineapple penis?
We don’t always have time to make them.

What the fuck is this?
Yam penis.

What the fuck is this?
Chicken feet.


You can purchase pineapple penises from our Doordash (delivery service) menu.


How should I answer the question “Hi, how are you?”
Owner usually ignores the question, but according to social critic Paul Fussell (who also hates the “how are you” question), that’s rude.  So we’ve come up with a few responses:

  • I’m a recovering narcissist so I’m not allowed to talk about myself anymore
  • I don’t know
  • Why do you want to know?
  • I don’t like sharing my feelings to strangers
  • None of your business

or tell them how you feel.

  • My butt hurts!
  • Angry, I want to kill someone
  • Horny, can we fuck?
  • Cranky, I want to throw this at someone.
  • Tired, I want to sleep until I’m dead

How the  batshit crazy answer stupid questions.


Is it true that I can order an original poem for $5 on Doordash?
Sometimes, and it comes with a gift.  Check Doordash menu to see if it’s available.

Are the poems any good?

Any samples?
Here’s an excerpt from a twenty-line poem:

Do I love you?
Would you know if I do?
What does love taste like?
A taste familiar,
yet refreshingly new

Not good but hopefully it’s entertaining and makes someone’s day better.

What happened to the avocado salad?
Replaced with a beet salad. The beets are cooked and then poached in a vinegar, pineapple, garlic, and ginger mixture. For now, they’re paired with beans and pickled cucumber.  It’ll evolve.

What’s in these jars?
Fire cider: ginger, garlic, jalapeno, orange peel, and vinegar.  $5.


Is it true that you offer free SAT tutoring and resume writing service?

Where would it take place?
In our dance studio.

Um, what sort of crazy resume will he teach my kid to write?
One that guarantees that he’ll get call backs.  One that looks like this: Boy Wants Job to Get Laid Resume

I sincerely want to know how owner is doing.  Can I get an answer?
Between 4am-2pm, he’s angry and happy (workout high).  From 2-5, he’s angry and tired = cranky.  (That’s why he’s usually on break during those hours).  From 5-10pm, he’s angry and happy (yoga high).  Now stop asking him this question.

Wait, how can someone be angry and  happy at the same time?
Example: football players coming out of the gate are happy and angry at the same time. Anger + happy = focused and high pain tolerance. Now stop having feelings about feelings because that’s why you’re batshit crazy.


Nine Years Old

Thanks to everyone who helped us make it to nine years.  We’re now the third oldest juice bar in Seattle metro area.

We’ve evolved from a place that makes eating veggies convenient and normal to a place that welcomes those who aren’t supposed to like veggies. Lately, we’ve been exploring how culture triggers our addictions to sugar and other drugs, legal and illegal. Our aim is to create an Alive Juice Bar where people can feel free enough from cultural constraints to examine societal norms as potential sources of our angst.  It’s a place where we turn mainstream culture upside down just to see, as if a laboratory, what happens.  What happens, for instance, when we encourage people to be assertive instead of polite?  Kind instead of nice? Frank instead of euphemistic?  What if we stop telling people we’re “fine” all the time and say instead that we’re in a lot of pain and are ok with it? What if we tell people it’s okay to feel anger and sadness, and to embrace such emotions to fight through the pain, just as a championship football player and a world class ballerina do? Would such an embrace bring us closer to the Dionysian spirit Nietzsche writes about?

Transform Beethoven’s ‘Hymn to Joy’ into a painting; let your imagination conceive the multitudes bowing to the dust, awestruck- then you will approach the Dionysian. (The Birth of Tragedy)

The Dionysian spirit finds strength and rejoices, not despite, but because of one’s own suffering, similar to how a brutally sacked quarterback gets back up to throw a game winning touchdown.  People are suffering not because of their suffering, but because they’re uncomfortable with their and other people’s suffering. The source of the obesity and opioid epidemic is our fear of pain, even though pain is what makes life worth living.

Nietzsche predicted that a stifling mass culture would emerge from democratic capitalism. This culture, he warned, will subvert our instincts — that Dionysian spirit — to live nobly.  And we’ll instead become slaves to envy and vanity, greed and sloth, and afraid of emotions such as anger and sadness. Watch out for that because the emotionally motivated pursuit of excellence, not freedom from pain and anger, is what affirms life and makes it worth living. We want to be the place where people can cultivate their pursuit of excellence by relieving themselves of the burden of trying to fit in with mass culture.  We want to be a place of mischief.


Next Move
We have a year left on our lease.  Since complex anchor 24 Hour Fitness is moving, we’ll also be moving to be closer to where they’re moving, We’re looking at spaces now, including a high ceilinged space next to Juicy Yoga. We’ll likely bring the dance studio with us and will design it as a flexible space so it can double as a restaurant (Redneck Bistro) three nights a week. Let’s see what happens.

There’s a lot of work to do.  Let’s do it, and let’s be troublesome about it.   Agape.


How to Run a Juice Bar (Owner’s Manual Series)


Don’t try to beat the competition by making the best product.
Instead, pick a price point and make the best product for that price point.  If you ask me which juice bar has the best salads, I’ll pick Heartbeet Cafe.  But I don’t try to make a salad similar to theirs because theirs costs $15, while mine costs $6. My customers show up 3-5 times a week, theirs show up once or twice a month.

The process is the business.
Amateurs think about recipes, professionals care about processes. Focus on process, not recipes. When a process breaks down, everything goes to shit. Create processes that minimize mistakes and speed up delivery time.  Remove anyone, including customers, who repeatedly fucks up the process. Letting a process break down is much deadlier to a business than pissing off a few customers.

Base recipes on process
Recipes should be based on, for instance, how long you want people to wait for something, never on what makes it seem fancy to customers. Complicated recipes means longer wait time and more mistakes so keep it simple.  Less is more and less tastes the best.

Choose ingredients based on infrastructure and price stability
Again, restaurants don’t begin with recipes.  They begin with your ability to work with the space and utilities infrastructure to develop recipes unique to your situation.  Ingredients you choose to use should be based on the context you’re working in: from the price stability and hardiness of an ingredient to the equipment you have.  Use ingredients in as many recipes as possible so you can purchase them at a volume discount and hedge against low sales of certain items.  For instance, we use beets in multiple drinks, a salad, and as chips.  That allows us to buy beets at a much lower price point than if we only used it in a salad.  The Nasty Shit smoothie is possible not because it sells well — it doesn’t, its purpose on the menu is to brand us as serious about veggies – but because its ingredients are used in our best selling drinks.

Choose your customers
Customers don’t choose you, you choose them. This will make you more pro-active in getting to know your customers — their fears and dreams — and make work more enjoyable.  When you host a party at your home, would you prefer to choose whom to invite or do you let random people in?  Costco doesn’t let everyone in. The best night clubs let few people in.

We chose the “Redneck Juice Bar” brand because juice bars, like yoga studios, are gendered feminine and men were refusing to come in. So we masculinized the juice bar so much so that 50 percent of our customers are now men, especially working class men.  And many of them are drinking kale smoothies and eating their veggies, they tip well, are respectful, they’re just fun to serve and be around.  To get their business, we had to piss off a lot of pompous and condescending customers, customers you and your employees shouldn’t have to deal with anyway.

Mindset of a Bad Cook (Alive Juice Bar Owner’s Manual)

Mindset matters. Its what feeds the bad habits others have written about it.

Bad cooks:

* assume everyone likes what they like.
* take it personally when someone doesn’t like what they like
* feel happy when complimented on their cooking
* take it personally when someone doesn’t like what they make
* don’t consider context
* don’t think about what the eater is experiencing
* have high self-esteem

The above explained.

Bad cooks assume everyone likes what they like.
Because they’re narcissists. It’s never occurred to them that other people are not just_like_them, that other people may not want to be treated the way they want to be treated. So they don’t make an effort to get to know other people as individuals with their own palates and preferences. Watching them cook is like watching a guy stick his dick up some woman’s ass without ever asking her if she’d like that because he assumes every woman likes anal.

Not everyone likes cheesecake.  Not everyone likes kimchi.  Not everyone likes bacon.  Some people like broccoli.  Some people like raw oysters. Some people like it up the ass.  Some people don’t like it up the ass.  Bad cooks are like shitty lovers, they’re not observant and curious enough — they rarely ask questions — to ever pay attention to their partner’s unique preferences.


Just because he likes it up the ass doesn’t mean everyone does, ok?

There are only two drinks on my menu that I enjoy and drink daily: the Attitude Cleanse and The Nasty Shit, both of which 99% of people won’t like. The drinks I don’t drink, they’re for customers who have different palate preferences from mine. If I only serve what I like, my business would fail. So know your audience and then figure out how far you’d go to satisfy them. You don’t have to take it up the ass if you don’t want to.  (I’ve seen juice bars resort to selling alcohol and ice cream to satisfy customers). And don’t try to satisfy everyone.  If you do, it means you have no integrity.  Stand for something.

This is a stupid life rule. Narcissists live by this rule because they think that what they want is what everyone else wants or should want.


Bad cooks take it personally when someone doesn’t like what they like. 
“How can you NOT like __________!!!!?????” asks the bad cook. And then he goes on and on and on about how much and why he likes it until he’s made it clear to everyone that he’s superior to anyone who doesn’t like what he likes.

Snobbery doesn’t work if the goal is to get someone to like something they don’t like.  Snobbery is about inflating the ego at another person’s expense.

Bad cooks feel happy when complimented on their cooking
Which isn’t the same as feeling happy when someone is enjoying food. Bad cooks waste their emotions on stupid shit like praise and cook to feed their ego instead of their customers. Put simply, bad cooks are addicted to compliments. Which means they lack integrity, they’ll do whatever it takes to get as many compliments as their addiction needs. If there’s no purpose to the food other than to win compliments, then sell candy instead of kale because a lot more people want the former than the latter.

And in any case, happiness (or is this contentment?) shouldn’t be contingent on external events because you can’t control what happens around you and trying to do so is usually futile.  True happiness comes from within, from that faith in oneself to handle any situation with aplomb. Bad cooks are who they are because they’re an emotional mess, they lose it when an oven stops working or Gordon Ramsey calls them a “dickface” or a car crashes into their kitchen (which happened to our neighbor, who handled it with humor and nonchalance).

Bad cooks take it personally when someone doesn’t like what they make
Bad cooks attach their ego to every dish they make. They think working this way makes them “passionate” when in fact it makes them too emotionally needy to ever take risks that make cooking fun in itself. That’s why bad cooks stick with popular recipes for popular dishes because it’s too risky to invent a dish someone may not like.

Bad cooks don’t consider context
Bad cooks are so focused on what they want that they’re unable to work with what’s available and to cook from multiple perspectives. This limits their repertoire and ability to improvise when something isn’t available.  It would never occur to a bad cook. for instance, to cook a meal on the engine of a running car (roadtrip cuisine!); to use a lemon instead of a lime to cut cost; to substitute this for that when that isn’t available; to work with the seasons.

Bad cooks don’t think about what the eater is experiencing as they eat
Inexperienced employees often ask what size this apple or that cucumber should be.  Never tell or show them the answer.  Ask them instead what size the customer wants it to be.  What does a woman want to look like while she’s eating a salad in public?  Does she want to open her mouth as if a porn star getting ready to swallow some Zulu sized dick or does she want to look dainty?  Would customers prefer their bento meals to look half full or almost too full when they open it? How should a salad be arranged to maximize its appeal to customers? How many colors and what type of shapes and textures should be on a plate?

Bad cooks have high self-esteem
They think so highly of themselves that they can’t imagine themselves making silly mistakes, like forgetting to put ice in a smoothie.  So they never implement checks — eg. feeling temperature of cup after pouring smoothie in it — into their workflow processes, if they even have one.

This hot dog also tastes like shit.

So What Makes a Good Cook?
Good cooks are primarily focused on what their customers want, not what they themselves want.  And then they work to strike a compromise between what the customer wants and what they themselves want and are willing to make.  What else?  Good cooks — their mindset –:

  • keep their egos out of their work
  • know that they’ll make mistakes
  • assume everyone  has unique preferences

Good cooks keep their egos out of their work
This makes them more objective when assessing their work.  This also allows them to not be hurt if someone doesn’t like what they make.  Which in turn frees them to experiment any way they want because they don’t care about rejection.

Good cooks know that they’ll make mistakes.
That’s why they check their work and invite colleagues and customers to check their work.

Good cooks assume everyone has unique preferences
This encourages them to ask customer questions about their preferences and priorities before telling them what they should get. Good cooks respect each person’s individuality.


General guidelines on how to run Alive Juice Bar and more cooking tips coming soon.






Jobs for All = Dumbfuckingest Idea EVER

Dumber than the second dumbest idea — “free college for all” — because I can at least imagine that program helping a few people (and hurting most) while jobs for all fucks everything up for everyone.

To begin with, most people are unemployable *in the present economy*. Just because someone has a job doesn’t mean that that person is employable — “suitable for paid work” — most who work are just live bodies filling in space that needs to be filled, like the kid stuck in right field because he can’t catch a pillow thrown at him. And then there are those who are unemployable because they consistently produce negative value: give them a dish to wash and they’ll break it; a car to transport things and they’ll run over people; a bank to run and they’ll start a nation-wide recession.  There are plenty of those and the goal should be to keep most people from working, not to give people jobs they’re sure to fuck up.

The Pareto Principle: the 80/20 Rule
Once upon a time, an Italian renaissance man named Vilfredo Pareto noticed that ~80 percent of the peas in his garden came from ~20 percent of the pods.  He looked around some more and saw that ~80 percent of land in Italy was owned by ~ 20 percent of Italian citizens.  And 80 percent of the food was grown on 20 percent of agricultural land.  This 80/20 is everywhere.

For instance, 80 percent of wealth is owned by 20 percent of population, and that’s typically true across all nations (aberrations are eventually self-corrected).  Eighty percent of Microsoft Word users use 20 percent of its features, while 20 percent of users use 80 percent of its features.  Twenty percent of employees generate 80 percent of revenue and vice versa.  Twenty percent of people commit 80 percent of crimes and vice versa.  You get the idea, the Pareto Principle is a law of nature and when you go against the law, you get something like the Killing Fields — disaster.

Pol Pot was a Social Justice Warrior. He executed 1.5 million of his countrypeople in the name of social justice.

It’s always been this way, most people have been un or barely employable, regardless of era and regime, and that’s never going to change. Men sitting in basements jerking off and playing video games isn’t a unique symptom of our post-industrial society, it’s a variation of what men have been doing for centuries, except ours is less violent because the routine acts of violence are virtual rather than real thanks to Nintendo and Playstation.


Customer who is a Boeing engineer told me that she mostly goofs off at work (and she was concerned about what that was doing to her work ethic and mental health).  The reason she goofs off is because her manager isn’t an engineer, he has an MBA and has no idea how long it should take an engineer to solve an engineering problem.  He gives her, for instance, two weeks to complete an assignment she finishes in four hours.

So who hired the barely competent, hardly qualified project manager who is too lazy to ask his staff how long it takes them to finish a task?  Incompetent human resources executives who hire incompetent human resource administrators who hire people based on degrees of questionable value (e.g. MBA) instead of their competencies. Beginning to see how 80 percent of employees in a business can contribute so little to a project yet keep their jobs, including executive ones?  An aside: you can’t study business the way you can Math, Physics and Logic.  Running a business is more of an art than a science — the context (e.g. regulations, taxes, weather, culture) is constantly changing and no two businesses are alike. It’s not like Math, where 2+2=4 no matter the weather, the tax laws, and who is president of the United States. In Math and Physics, a consensus is possible.  In business, it isn’t and when someone insists it is, it leads to disaster, like nosediving demon planes. Now let’s get back to the question about the prevalence of incompetence in the  workplace. From the New Republic’s investigative news article Crash Course: How Boeing’s Managerial Revolution led to the 737 Max Disaster, “the

Boeing assembly line that opened in 2011 had for years churned out scores of whistle-blower complaints and wrongful termination lawsuits packed with scenes wherein quality-control documents were regularly forged, employees who enforced standards were sabotaged, and planes were routinely delivered to airlines with loose screws, scratched windows, and random debris everywhere.

Oops, Boeing 737 goes splat!

How about high school counselors, how many of them are good at advising students on coursework, college and career options, and life in general? Or do most regurgitate basic basic info that’s easily found online? Here’s a test you can give to a high school counselor, see how many can answer these questions off the top of their heads:

Identify the following schools, which state each is located and what each is known for:

a) Williams College
b) Bryn Mawr College
c) CalTech University
d) Harvey Mudd College

What percentage of counselors have an informed opinion about any of the schools listed?  Now these aren’t some fringe schools that don’t matter, these are some of the most prestigious schools in the US that every competent high school counselor needs to know about to serve their students well

  • Williams College — located in rural Massachusetts, considered one of the top liberal arts colleges in the US, ranked number one liberal arts college several times by US News World Report’s annual college rankings
  • Bryn Mawr College — located in suburban Philadelphia, a “Seven Sister School,” one  of the top ranked women’s colleges in the US
  • Cal Tech University — located in Pasadena CA, considered by some as the top engineering research school in the world.
  • Harvey Mudd College — located in Southern California, the top science and engineering liberal arts college in the US.

What’s the point of having a high school counselor who doesn’t spend two weeks a year to learn about schools most aren’t familiar with so he can properly advise students on college options so that each individual’s personality matches well with the spirit of a particular school? If he’s too lazy to do his work properly — hey fucktards, read at least the annual US News college rankings so you know what is and isn’t a safety school or a good match for each college bound student — should he be advising students on career and lifestyle choices? Are these the same fucktards who tell every student to go to college regardless of personal interest and test scores so a bunch of kids grow up to be broke and confused adults who wasted their most productive years getting bullshit degrees from bullshit colleges?  Is bad advice that ruin people’s lives what taxpayers are paying for?

Let’s look at teachers: how many of them have you had who were good, who made a positive difference in your life?  How many didn’t make a difference at all?  How many wasted your time?  How many fucked you up, beat the curiosity out of you with asinine rules and demented pedagogy? Count them up. What percentage made a positive difference, is it closer to 20 percent or 80 percent?  Or did they overall teach you to act, talk, and think more like a Trader Joe’s cashier than the CEO you dreamed of becoming?  Are you even capable of asking a question — any question — other than perfunctory ones like “how was your day?” when you’re on a date, or do you mostly talk about yourself and repeat cliches because you spent a sizable chunk of your childhood in a:

dull and ugly place, where nobody ever says anything very truthful, where everybody is playing a kind of role, as in a charade where the teachers are no more free to respond honestly to the students than the students are free to respond to the teachers or each other, where the air practically vibrates with suspicion and anxiety, the child learns to live in a daze, saving his energies for those small parts of his life that are too trivial for the adults to bother with, and thus remain his. It is a rare child who can come through his schooling with much left of his curiosity, his independence or his sense of his own dignity, competence and worth. (John Holt, published in Saturday Evening Post, 1969)

Which sounds a lot like the Boeing work environment — sub “teacher” with “manager” and “students” with “staff” — the above cited New Republic article describes.  Should we be surprised that our work environments aren’t much different from our school environments? Should we spend more money on replicating dysfunction and incompetence?

What Sort of Jobs?
Let’s play along, what sort of jobs would the Federal government provide?  Bernie says:

  • As part of the Green New Deal, we need millions of workers to rebuild our crumbling infrastructure—roads, bridges, drinking water systems, wastewater plants, rail, schools, affordable housing—and build our 100% sustainable energy system. This infrastructure is critical to a thriving, green economy.
  • At a time when our early childhood education system is totally inadequate, we need hundreds of thousands of workers to provide quality care to the young children of our country.
  • As the nation ages, we will need many more workers to provide supportive services for seniors to help them age in their homes and communities, which is where they want to be.

So does Robbie the Rapist teach four-year-olds the pledge of allegiance? Should Fat Freddie be anywhere near a shovel?  What happens when Sad Sally takes care of grandma? Mickey the Methhead promises to  never jerk off again while at work. The US government already provides jobs to anyone of “working age” who wants one — that’s what the US military does and it’s still not meeting its enlistment goals — unless he or she:

  • is a psychopath
  • has an iq below 82
  • is obese
  • is mentally or physically ill

National Center for Health Statistics at the CDC showed that 39.6% of US adults age 20 and older were obese as of 2015-2016 (37.9% for men and 41.1% for women). According to Mental Health First Aid, “in the United States, almost half of adults (46.4 percent) will experience a mental illness during their lifetime,” with “half of all mental disorders [beginning] by age 14 and three-quarters by age 24.”  Ten percent of the population have IQs lower than 82. Let’s not even bother to look up the percentage of people who are psychopaths, which I’m sure is waaaay underestimated. So are these minimum requirements for employment reasonable? Go imagine yourself having a threesome with Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren if you think not.  If they are, then what percentage of the US population is unemployable?  Are we really going to let someone who is obese build a bridge? Or someone with an IQ lower than 82 to engineer a bridge? A chronically depressed caretaker to take care of the elderly?

Freddy wants a job. He especially likes to babysit kids.

The private and public sectors already employ many who don’t meet minimum US military requirements for employment.  Meaning, most of the unemployed are probably the worst of the unemployable —  they can’t wake up on time, they never brush their teeth, they can’t remember anything that doesn’t have to do with themselves, they’re pathological liars, etc. And some feckless politicians still want to guarantee them jobs?  It takes a highly skilled and disciplined workforce to build and repair roads and bridges — work already done by the Army Corp of Engineers by the way — you can’t just let anyone have at it.

But Work Makes People Dignified
How so?  According to a 2017 Gallup poll, 85% of workers in the world hate their jobs. A 2013 Forbes magazine reported that “work is more often a source of frustration than fulfillment for nearly 90% of the world’s workers.” The good news is that in the US, only 70% say they hate their jobs, comparable to the percentage of American kids who say they hate mandatory education. Am I missing something, is there something dignified about hating your job? Or are the government jobs going to be so gosh darn awesome that *everyone* is going to love them and turn into the model workers champagne socialists fantasize about?

It’s not a politician’s job to tell people what is or isn’t a dignified life, that’s playing God and will lead to tyranny. And we don’t force Puki the Pomeranian Princess to pull a sled in the snow to be a dignified dog. People can decide for themselves what sort of life they want to live, and for some, it’s going to be a life without work.  You can still have a sense of purpose in life without going to work — think of all the retired grandparents who hang out with their grandkids and tend gardens.

Puki says: “Kiya the crazy Husky can pull sleds. Me, I just want to look pretty and pampered.”

Universal Basic Income
There are a lot of people who want to work but are unemployable.  Like the journalist who is too lazy to fact check and too unimaginative to sense the implausibility of someone’s account; doctors who don’t wash their hands between patient visits; personal trainers who only talk about themselves during the entire session; Sociology professors who teach books they’ve never read; lawyers who don’t read contracts they’re paid to read.

The good news is that the next phase of automation will result in more of the unemployable employed to become unemployed. That’s a good thing because it’ll lead to a significant increase in productivity and — if we do it right — quality of life. Leaving a lot of people out of work, however, is a bad thing because they’re likely to riot as the Luddites did in the early 19th century when their jobs were replaced by industrialization.  To reduce the likelihood of widespread social disturbance and to offset the economic effects of automation, we should aim to pay everyone — yes, EVERYone in the world — a living allowance.  Presidential candidate Andrew Yang’s Freedom Dividend — $1000/month to every American citizen age 18-64 — is a step in that direction.

What Happens Next?
Technologically, we’re so close to providing universal healthcare without reduction of quality and rising costs. The automation of most healthcare work will significantly reduce healthcare costs and make it and many other services accessible to everyone.  This will happen sooner than later if we stop using resources to fund policies that create disasters we have to clean up and start preparing people for a future without work as we define it today. A new world is around the corner, we should see what it looks like instead of turning around and running back to 20th century solutions — guaranteed jobs and free college — to 21st century problems.


Stop Trying to Fix Education System, Let Kids Choose

Presidential candidate Andrew Yang tweeted:

Many of our high school students check out because they don’t feel they are learning things that will actually be relevant to them.  We should be teaching them financial literacy, positive psychology, communication and healthy use of technology in high schools.

No we shouldn’t.  Not just because there are as many ideas of what education ought to be as there are individuals — the incessant debates about curriculum aren’t worth it, save it for another battle.  It’s because the second line of the above tweet reeks of tyranny. “Financial literacy” for whom? Each individual, after all, has their own tolerance for risk and life goals, one size fits all doesn’t work here unless you want everyone to be equally risk averse.  “Positive psychology” — all the rage in Middle Class America — hasn’t worked because it turns out overthinking and denying certain emotions isn’t healthy.  “Communication,” which they already try and fail to teach in most English classes, sounds like an invite to Orwellian language police. And finally, what’s  “healthy” and what the fuck does “technology” mean? What’s more problematic, the toilet or the phone when I take a shit while texting?

Yang’s right, many if not most high school students check out. As they should because most people learn from working, not from lecture and whatever they’re learning at 98 percent of schools is garbage anyway and they know it. They’re not learning algebra or trigonometry, they’re learning how to pass those classes to get a virtue signalling degree. What makes people think a “financial literacy” class would be treated any differently at the high school level? People learn financial literacy and anything else when they want to, not when someone tells them to learn it.

Kids, be like Donnie.  He’s a good boy because he tells teachers to fuck off when forced to learn touchy-feely bullshit.  

Why We Shouldn’t Fix the Problem
Because it’s like teaching a dog to climb a tree, it’s a waste of time.  Just because a few dogs have climbed trees doesn’t mean we should try to teach all dogs to do the same.  To satisfy your curiosity, here’s a clip of a dog climbing a tree:

Would you be disappointed in your dog for not climbing a tree like the one in the video?  Then why are we trying to fix schools, which are just dogs trying to teach dogs to climb trees? Most dogs don’t want to climb a tree and most people don’t learn in a classroom setting. Stop lying to yourself, what the fuck did you learn in school other than how to pass courses without learning anything?  Can you even do basic algebra and geometry, can you manipulate a binomial equation and finish a geometric proof and explain the point of doing so?

Again, most people learn by DOING what they want to do, not by being told what to do. Leonardo Da Vinci never had a formal education, he informally learned Latin, Geometry, and Mathematics before beginning his apprenticeship at a leading workshop at age 14, where he “was exposed to both theoretical training and a wide range of technical skills,including drafting, chemistry, metallurgy, metal working, plaster casting, leather working, mechanics, and wood-work, as well as the artistic skills of drawing, painting, sculpting, and modelling” (wiki). Bill Gates taught himself to code when he was in 8th grade, not from any class at Lakeside and Harvard, and used this skill to create mischief that later became Microsoft.  Same with Mark Zuckerberg, except he read “C++ for Dummies” his dad got him when he was 11 years old so he could create fun games for himself and his sisters. If the geniuses of past and present lived a life of technical pursuits supported by theoretical training, then why are we forcing kids to learn abstractions they won’t understand without proper technical experience? You can’t use the clerical approach to education — schools were originally created to train clergymen — if you’re trying to provide technical training. And if all the geniuses in history learned primarily by doing, then why are we living life ass backwards?   

Telling kids what schoolwork is relevant to their lives instead of letting them figure it out for themselves is an even worse idea, that’s how people lose their individuality, when they’re taught to think and act like everyone else.  (And they’ll make up for their lost individuality with shallow expressions of individuality in dress, hairstyle, etc.).

Let Kids Choose
Let schools do whatever they want to do, it’s nobody else’s business. But what we can do is let people, after they graduate from 8th grade, choose their own coursework, if they want to take any at all.  This is similar to how Andrew Yang wants tech tax dollars to go to the people instead of the government — trickle up economy — so the people can choose individually how that money should be spent.  Put simply, end mandatory education at 8th grade, and let people decide what’s relevant to their lives, whether it be coursework or work, and without stigma. That’s how it was — most people started to work after 8th grade, just as Da Vinci did — when the US grew into the superpower that’s now strangling itself because of its eroding freedoms, including the freedom from having to attend Education Camps. Let’s get back to what worked for the people, not the education-industrial complex that’s more concerned about legitimizing its existence than educating people.

Why School is Bad For You
And not just because it’s inefficient and mostly ineffective at educating people. The most insidious part of school is that turns students into mental cripples dependent on being spoon-fed by teachers in order to learn anything. It turns people into slaves, really.  At the same time — and this is what’s really sick and twisted about schools — they convince their students that they’re actually getting smarter and more educated solely because they’re in school, even though they’re not learning much there and would learn a lot more by making, fixing, and experimenting with things, as Steve Jobs had.

So you end up with graduates who think they’re smart just because they have a diploma. And that they’ll be even smarter if they spend more time in school and collect more diplomas. For some, school becomes a fetish except it costs a lot more than the schoolgirl panties that some Japanese guys sniff to sleep.

How to Go to School Like an Asian
Asians do well in school because they DON’T follow the pace set by teacher and they learn most of the material AT HOME (during the Summer), not at school.  That’s why they go to churches that provide free tutoring.  That’s why they borrow from library extra math books, so they can drill, drill, and drill through the summer and every weekend during the school year. That’s why they start studying for the SATs in 7th grade instead of never. That’s why they save enough to go to summer robotics camp, so they can figure out how to have fun with Math and Physics.  They think of schools as the place to test knowledge and skills in a competitive setting, not as a place of learning.

Chart suggests that how good or bad a school is is irrelevant, so it’s not worth trying to change a school. It’s the mindset of the student that matters the most.


It was the same way for Da Vinci, Mozart, Benjamin Franklin, Abraham Lincoln…all the way up to Mark Zuckerberg, who got his start at age 11 with a “C++ for Dummies” book.  For them, learning primarily takes place at home, in the community, and at work — as it had been for hundreds if not thousands of years — not at an Education Camp.  They became who they are because they understood that if you can’t learn something on your own, you won’t learn it at school.  The difference between top students and average students is mindset, nothing else.

Most people learn by doing, not by listening. Which means people should begin work the moment they can, not at some arbitrary age decided by bureaucrats who think of people as data rather than as individuals. Work, not school, is where one becomes educated, school is just a supplement when needed.  By living life ass backwards, we are, in former teacher and anti-school activist John Taylor Gatto’s words, “drilled in being bored, frightened, envious, emotionally needy, generally incomplete” because “life, according to school, is dull and stupid, only consumption promises relief: Coke, Big Macs, fashion jeans, that’s where real meaning is found, that is the classroom’s lesson, however indirectly delivered.” And you still want to send people to school against their will, you still want to try to fix it?

The film Breakfast Club is about Education Camps in the USA.

Or we can make school optional and return to the apprenticeship model of learning that has reliably produced the greatest minds in history.




Stop Buying This Shit (if you want to save money)

Below is a list of some grocery items people buy that they shouldn’t buy if they want to save money and have a healthier diet.

6. Orange juice.  Sure, it has Vitamin C.  So does bell pepper, broccoli, kale and so on and so forth…WITHOUT the sugar. Most fruits should be eaten — as a smoothie is fine, it still has the fiber — not drunk as a juice.

5. Skinless Chicken Breast
Why pay more for less? First, the skin helps keep the muscle meat moist when you cook it.  Second, skin has collagen, which helps your skin look young.  Third, skin is flavorful and without it, people are going to drench the chicken in gravy or ranch dressing or something like that. Fourth, if you really don’t want to eat skin (which is good for you as long as you don’t eat too much of it), take it off yourself.  Is it really worth paying more to have someone else take it off for you?

4. Lean ground beef
If the goal is to make a burger, keep in mind that most of the fat will be cooked off anyway. So regardless of how fatty the ground beef is, you end up with the same end product.  If it’s to make spaghetti or meatloaf, you can drain the fat yourself.  Though I don’t recommend wasting any part of an animal — the fat can, for instance, be used to stir fry veggies or to make a confit — because it isn’t animal fat that makes people fat and sick, it’s the gargantuan PORTION SIZES and excessive sugar intake that does.


3. Kobe ground beef
Kobe ground beef is known for its high fat content. So why does it cost more than lean ground beef, which in turn costs more than its fattier counterparts? Because we live in the Land of Confusion, where we’re taught to trust strangers with impressive sounding titles and degrees instead of our instincts.

In any case, the fat will be cooked off if you’re using it to make a burger, so you’re paying a premium for nothing.  If you prefer more fat in your spaghetti, the cheapest ground beef available will provide comparable amount of fat at a much lower price.

And the celebrated tenderness of Kobe beef doesn’t apply to the ground version, because ground beef, by definition, is already tender.

2. Chicken breast
Dark meat is preferred in most parts of the world because it’s much more flavorful and juicier than its white counterpart. But not in the Land of Confusion, where white meat is wrongly considered the healthier option just because White supremacy insists that all things “White,” regardless of species, must be superior to anything “Dark,” it contains less fat and fewer calories than its dark counterpart.  Dark meat offers more zinc, riboflavin, niacin, thiamine, taurine, vitamins B12 and B6, and iron than does White meat.

So quit acting like a fucking racist and eat some dark meat.  The only reason why so many people tolerate White people meat is because it’s been infused with broth so that it’s as juicy as the juiciest, biggest dark meat you’ve ever had. Or they counter the dryness and lack of flavor by drenching it in gravies and sauces to make it palatable, which significantly increases caloric intake.

So to save money and to eat fewer calories, buy dark meat instead of white meat.

1.  Meal Kits
They’re expensive — $10-$15/person per meal — and no, they don’t teach anyone how to cook anymore than the Kama Sutra teaches people how to have sex (which isn’t its purpose anyway).  Cooking isn’t a matter of following recipes, it’s about engaging the senses and releasing the instincts.  These meal kits are an extension of an education system that teaches people to follow someone else’s procedures instead of figuring out how to do something on one’s own.  And in any case, there are cheaper ways to learn how to cook with recipes (youtube, recipe books), just as there are cheaper ways to get an education than going to school.

Point is, trust your instincts.  Listen to your body, it’ll tell you what you need and how much to eat.  To do that, you need to block out the noise of marketing scams and confusing proclamations about what is or isn’t healthy for you.  There’ll be a post about how to eat with your instincts soon.


This meal kit cost $30 and takes most people 40 minutes to prepare. This meal kit is like college: both are rip offs that make people poor and stupid.

Free College is Second Dumbest Idea Ever

It’s election season, and some dumbfuck politicians are at it again, proposing some dumbfucking solutions to our problems that’ll make more people fat, miserable, and crazy. “Free college” is one of them and below are some of the reasons why it’s the second dumbest policy proposal ever. (We’ll get to dumbest policy in another post).

Most Colleges Suck and Make Students Dumber

First, 80 percent of colleges are garbage. How the fuck does a school like Evergreen State College, with its 98% admissions rate, stay open when they graduate mostly unemployable nitwits, some who are literally illiterate?  Most of the remaining “decent” schools are high schools masquerading as colleges, you don’t even have to pass Calculus to get a degree from them. Think I’m exaggerating? Watch this Evergreen College student try to read a statement during a protest:


What the fuck, she has trouble reading words like “disabled” and “allegations” and “sentencing.” Even at a “decent” school like The University of Washington Seattle, I encountered, as a teaching assistant in charge of grading papers and leading discussion sections, two students who read and wrote at around the third grade level (neither were athletes, one was holy fuck an Asian, the other a paraplegic), and most students  were reading and writing at around eighth to tenth grade level.  And I was asked to pass all of them, the only way you can flunk out is to not turn in any assignment, even a page of gibberish gets a passing grade. If you still think I’m exaggerating, take a glance at a UW course catalog, Autumn 2018, and you’ll see 16 sections of high school algebra and 15 sections of pre-calculus. How the fuck did all these people get into Washington state’s flagship university?

The admissions committee (at most schools) is made up of feckless morons, that’s how.  These sentimental dipshits think “education,” regardless of major and coursework, will magically fix all social problems and will ensure that its students get smarter, so they admit students based on their personal sob stories and social background instead of their level of preparation for college level work. It’s sick and twisted, it’s like letting an old fat guy practice with UW’s football team just because he’s always wanted to — someone is going to get hurt.  But these weepy dunces don’t care because they’re more in love with their intentions than taking responsibility for unintended consequences such as student debt, wasted years, and useless degrees.  “But an education is priceless, is an end in itself,” retorts the maudlin imbecile who hates his job as a warehouse clerk but is convinced of his moral and intellectual superiority over anyone without his Master’s degrees in Social Justice and Education. No, you whimpering idiot: curiosity is priceless, grit is priceless, that’s why they’re FREE to have AND difficult to attain. Meanwhile, your stupid diplomas are priced the same as that townhouse you dream of  living in and never will, and in any case, you didn’t get an education, you got indoctrination with a concentration in self-righteous indignation.

Would you send yourself to a bad hospital, where half the patients end up either sicker or dead and the few who end up better are advertised as proof that this hospital is worth going to? You answered “yes” if you’re willing to send yourself to Shaw University, where the graduation rate is 23%, the average student debt is $28,000, and the average SAT of incoming students is 850, which translated into IQ means borderline retarded. If you think the solution to borderline retarded is college, then you’re fucktarded and deserve to spend Hell teaching a dog to climb a tree while getting butt fucked by a raccoon.

And most of the good schools are like good hospitals, they still get students who choose the wrong major and coursework, just as good hospitals get patients who won’t start exercising and eating veggies. Meaning, free college is a waste of money *in most cases* either because the school sucks or because most people choose easy, useless majors that turn them batshit crazy when they discover that the world outside of school doesn’t match up with what’s taught in school.

Shit schools actually decrease earnings probably because they make students dumber. I’m also betting that if you take out the accounting, engineering, and nursing majors at middling schools, there’d be a wage and iq decrease for remaining graduates. I’m also wondering what a Bottom Public college like Evergreen does to its students mentally and financially.

There’s nothing wrong with taking a college course, even if it’s about what some freaky French faggot named Foucault thinks about power, prisons, pornography, and his penis.  There is something wrong with giving away something for free that’s often as dangerous and addictive as alcohol and meth and as easy as the neighborhood slut.

We Need a New Message
More dangerously, “free college” sends the message that a college degree is so important that life isn’t worth living if you don’t have one.  Which is like calling someone a loser because they don’t drive a Tesla and wear Valentino, both are dick moves.  “But college graduates earn more than those with only high school degrees,” says the clueless cretin who flunked Stat 101, one of the few college courses that matter. Hey shitface, disaggregate the data and run a regression analysis, okay?  A behavioral economist did just that and here’s his conclusion about college:

Put simply, if you’re not taking Math, Physics, and Philosophy courses — mastery of those three disciplines prepares you to get a PhD in any field and to become an expert at most jobs — you’re probably wasting your time.  Not saying there’s no value to a classical liberal arts education — I’m all for the study of human nature from different disciplinary perspectives — but outside of a handful of schools few have heard of, where the fuck do you find that nowadays?

This book is considered the cook’s bible. The author doesn’t have a culinary degree, he went to CalTech, one of the top engineering schools in the world. He learned to cook by taking Math and Physics classes and practiced writing by getting his PhD in literature from Yale.

We Need More Rednecks
Redneck jobs pay well and they’re in high demand.

Where are the Redneck Technicians?


How much is the Sociology major making?



Lots of work for Rednecks who can fix everyday energy problems college students have no interest in fixing because they’re taught that such jobs are beneath them and it’s better to be a cashier at Trader Joe’s.

We Need More Engineers
The best place to learn Engineering 101 is in any of the construction trades. Take some kid out of 8th grade, give him a job in one of the trades for three years, then put him back in school and see what happens. Math and Physics — the foundation of engineering — will start to make sense because most people learn by doing, not by lecture. This won’t happen as long as we have archaic child labor laws, mandatory education, and bonehead ideas like “free college” that stigmatize vocational work and education.

But College Used to Be Free at Some Schools like Berkeley and CUNY
So was herpes when Jimmy fucked that whore.  And in any case, the few students who should be in college immediately after high school will still get to go for free because there’s competition for the best students.  Let the free market decide who should or shouldn’t be going to college, just as we let the free market decide who should or shouldn’t play professional sports.  Imagine if the government created a bunch of free junior football leagues and told everyone to play football just because the stats show that NFL players make a lot more money than do non-NFL players. So why are we letting the government open mostly bullshit schools that do far more harm than good and then propose making them free to everyone in hopes of turning those with IQs of 90 into STEM scientists?

They’ll Stick the Bill to Businesses
Because these delirious dingbats actually think they’re helping businesses by “educating” people to become better employees, smarter consumers, and virtuous citizens. Yet the opposite happens when someone spends four years pretending to read Foucault and Derrida, Butler and Steinem, and making up and policing microaggressions while hiding from them in their safe spaces. And then they actually believe they have great communication skills because they majored in communications, that they understand politics because they majored in political science…they graduate as insufferable know-it-alls who don’t know that they know nothing except how to complain about stupid shit because that’s what they’re taught to do when they major in Ethnic Studies. These people are unemployable, that’s why they end up in academia, where you can make a living complaining about stupid shit.

What’s the Stupidest Policy?
Guaranteed Federal jobs for all.  Post on that coming soon.